Friday, January 28, 2011

Things Copenhagen Should Have: More Schlock, please

I love Copenhagen. A lot. 

But I would love her even more if she had the following: In ’n Out Burger, Walgreens, braggarts, California Pizza Kitchen, Jews, Loehmann’s, waffle houses, soft values, Sesame Street, and chivalry...

...Whole Foods, Sephora, Trader Joe’s, drive-thru Starbucks, factory outlets, Boot Barn, Barnes & Nobles, Chipotle, Republicans, Arnold Palmers and love letters.

7-layer dip, Mystic spray tans, marital fidelity, church-goers, Arden Hills Country Club, Super Bowl parties, Apple Stores, drive-thru chapels, schlocky tchotchkes, J. Crew and breakfast for dinner. 

I'd love to see MORE excess in a way that doesn't involve percentage-alcohol. More wallpaper, more tacky, more bragging, more eye-contact, more diversity, more outbursts, more New Age, more pills, more acupuncture, more nice, more modesty, more calories, more largesse, more charity, more taboos, more therapy, more pilates, more blue cheese dressing, more cheap Porsches, more sun. 

Found at:

More tomfoolery, more sober misbehavin’, more g-droppin, more country music, more hip-hop, more Christian debauchery. More postmodern pillow-talk.

And more and more more. 

That's all for now. Feel free to add more, or subtract.

Happy Friday!